Finding Your Bliss

MAKE YOUR BED AND LIE IN IT

Part 5

You may always have known what “floats your boat” or you may have spent much of your life in vague or outright discontent because your existence so far has been some other director’s movie when you should have been directing it yourself. Whatever the case, you need to grab the director’s chair ready to re-invent yourself and your life, and start making the movie your way, from the heart. If you need some help to dig out your authentic desires so you can turn them into a stunning script, there are many wonderful books available to show you how to do this, including one called ‘Simple Abundance’ by Sarah Ban Breathnach, from which the following excerpt has been taken:

The key to loving how you live is in knowing what it is you truly love. ‘To know what you prefer instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you that you ought to prefer, is to keep your soul alive,” 

Robert Louis Stevenson reminds us. Keeping our soul alive and nurturing our creativity is paramount in our quest for fulfilment , and it is only after we acknowledge our inner needs that we can harness the energy necessary to manifest them in our lives.

“It is inevitable that when one has a great need of something, one finds it,” Gertrude Stein reminds us. ‘What you need you attract like a lover.”

                                                                      Refined from  ‘Simple Abundance’

To discover your ‘bliss’ you must first discover what pleases you, that place where your heart leaps for joy.  Follow your instincts – they are the signposts to an exciting and fulfilling life. Choose paths that feel appropriate to you and follow them wherever they lead. There is a journey and adventure ahead, no matter what your age or circumstance. You are being called, and opportunities will always make themselves available to you when you follow this call.

Each of us is called to be courageous and trust the voice within. When you do so, every cell in your body is alive. There is an amplification of life and consciousness. You may not know what your next step is, but the adventure has begun.

Your experiences in life are unique. No-one has lived a life like yours before. Nor will anyone have your particular opportunities and talents. It is the uniqueness of your life’s journey that gives you the potential to contribute so much.

                                                                                             From ‘Happiness

Whatever the components of your “big, fat dreams” the same principles apply when it comes to living them.

Bliss-Low

Tell your  children…

No-one knows how long their time on earth is going to be, so when we are of an age to understand that this is our one chance to get it right, we should find the things that sing to our soul and make them our driving force.

Having a fulfilled soul will bring us joy when all is going well, and solace when life is difficult.

The songs will change with different phases and decades, but you must always follow your bliss.

Your Attitude

MAKE YOUR BED AND LIE IN IT

Part 4

Knowing how to achieve inner equilibrium is important, but your attitude towards life makes or breaks the quality of your life’s journey.

—- The way you touch life is the way it touches you back. Touch it with love, and love will flow to you. Love life and it will love you back.

—- You see in your life essentially what you believe. If, for example, you were to believe strongly in scarcity, think about it regularly, and make it the focus of your conversations, you would probably see a great deal of it in your life. On the other hand, if you believe in happiness and abundance, think only about them, talk about them to others, and act on your belief in them, it is a very good bet you will see what you believe.
From ‘You’ll See It When You Believe It’

—- Practice being positive . A positive mental attitude (whether it sounds old hat or not) is what you have to integrate into your life until it becomes a part of you. Initially it may not be easy, but the more little successes and joys and good outcomes you clock up and take note of, the more you will trust in the concept, and the easier the climb will become. Soon, you’ll be adept at it.

A positive attitude means looking on the bright side, finding the best in things, believing that what you want to achieve can be done. You harbour no negative feelings towards yourself, your capabilities, your destiny. As we noted before, everyone has lows in their life, but they shouldn’t be invited in because you’ve been standing at the gates of life shouting “Hey! Over here!”. Your life can be better and happier because that’s what you expect.

—– Day to day contentment is something you can make for yourself by trying to keep your mind constantly on the pleasant aspects of life and the things that can improve your situation. Try to forget (and avoid) everything that is irrevocably ugly, irredeemingly depressing or totally mundane. This is perhaps the most efficient way of minimising the factors that can induce stress, while at the same time filling your life with a soft shine that will show itself to others, too.

Cultivate agreeable thoughts; be friendly and smile a lot; focus on things that will enhance the quality of your days. And keep a healthy sense of humour – learn to laugh with life.

Resolve to see the world on the sunny side, and you have almost won the battle of life at the outset.

Sir Roger L’Estrange

Inner Equilibrium

MAKE YOUR BED AND LIE IN IT

Part 3

photo-1429277158984-614d155e0017

So now you’re going to be liking the wonderful, unique, quality person that you are, you need to know how to achieve inner equilibrium. And if you have this, happiness and success will have a more fertile ground to grow on.

You need to stop events, and other people, from dragging you along in their wake; you are responsible for your own feelings and the way your life shapes up. Taking ownership of your life is very important. The sea will still get choppy, but if you are at the helm of your own boat, you can control the boat a lot better than if you step back and give yourself up to the mercy of the water. This is not a fail-proof theory but for the most part it works. And sure, all sorts of stuff can stress you out, but it’s how you react that counts. Be strong; be wise. Remember, a high self-esteem means you don’t take rough spots too much to heart, and a positive attitude means you don’t nurture them. Nor do you create problems that aren’t really there. Besides, the more involved you are in the interesting and exciting life unfolding for you, the less petty and obsessive you will be over minor annoyances.

Dealing with general problems and tensions in a constructive way helps enormously towards inner peace. They’ll be there, but they can be minimised, often solved fairly quickly, and even got rid of before they have time to grow. The best way to tackle any feeling of unease you may have is to pin it down before it seeps through to the rest of your soul, and set out to do something about it. With a very obvious problem, face it, and get moving towards resolving it. Often just a “does it really matter?” will bring the answer “no, there’s really nothing to worry about.” But where the tension is real, you have to find answers. Only by getting past it can you get back onto the highway again. If there is no answer to be had, sometimes you just have to put the concern in a box at the back of your head for a while and close the lid so that you can get on with your day to day living.

Remember:

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.

Emotional issues like hurt, sadness, and grief often have to be ridden out until your system is ready to let go. We can all expect a fair amount of difficult stuff like that in our lives. Seek support, comfort and distraction and know that time is a great healer. You shouldn’t try to hide from these fundamental emotions.

Where to Start: How a good sense of self helps you free your energies

MAKE YOUR BED AND LIE IN IT

The second instalment of my mums bookphoto-1429277005502-eed8e872fe52

“LIFE IS NOT LOST BY DYING! LIFE IS LOST MOMENT BY MOMENT, DAY BY DRAGGING DAY, IN ALL THE THOUSAND, SMALL, UNCARING WAYS – THE SMOOTH APPEASING COMPROMISES OF TIME.”

STEPHEN VINCENT BENET

Real freedom is being happy with who you are as a person, allowing you to grow in a forward direction, and to relax and live life to its fullest. You are never inferior or superior to anyone else, but you are the best you possible, someone you both love and respect, and you have a healthy attitude towards life. Your time isn’t spent trying to sort out hang-ups about yourself, or struggling to rise above things; your time is spent constructively by living and your energy is positive energy.

Feeling great about yourself enhances your life in other ways besides giving you freedom to move. If you feel as if you’re someone worthy of love and respect, others are likely to feel you are too; if you’re at home with yourself, they will be also. And the inner beauty and serenity that your attitude towards life – a bright, positive one – brings to you will lend you a glow and vitality that draws people like a magnet. Having the support and friendship of the world in general is a big advantage along life’s journey.

Becoming Your Best You

First of all, accept that you were born the person you are. Whether you feel you have been blessed or not, you’re you. But that doesn’t mean you have to be faithful to the way you are at the moment. You can be better, the best you possible; liken yourself to a rose bush that can either be left to its own devices to produce mediocre blooms, or a rose bush that is tended and nurtured and has really magnificent flowers. You can have that healthy self-esteem that real confidence and energy are built upon.

If you know your assets, you can work at bringing out all the good points about yourself, and minimising the not so good. Picture a new improved version of yourself: your looks and personality enhanced in a way you may not have allowed yourself to dream about before. Bring that picture to mind as you work about becoming that person – mind movies are potent things.

You can become this wonderful, authentic person; step by step by step. As from this moment onwards, love who you are and what you’re going to be.

But it’s not only about looks and personality . It is also about finding your bliss, your path in life. This is covered in a separate section and is irrevocably connected to becoming a better you. It is the impetus that makes seeking your freedom so desirable. Your “bliss” is the life you want to live as the new you!

Make Your Bed and Lie In It – Introduction

I am going to start intermittently sharing my mums book in parts with you all. It inspires me to read, hopefully it may inspire some of you along the way and reveal why she was such an amazing lady. It may not be a movie but I’m pretty sure she would be feeling pretty chuffed regardless!

INTRODUCTION

MAKING THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE

When you see life as a truly precious commodity, you don’t want to let it just drift by. Making the most of time, your gifts and your blessings is essential. Even if you live to be eighty, you want it to have been a grand existence, no matter how it started or what obstacles you encountered on the way. And if you don’t have that long, it’s even more important to use and enjoy your time to the fullest.

By integrating the wisdoms of this book (and others like it) into your life, whether you falter a little or a lot, you have a strength of spirit and purpose that enables you to harness a real dream of a life from the universe.

There will be glorious lilting moments, softer contentments, warm satisfactions; there will also be mistakes and hiccups and sadnesses; all of them making up the story of your life. To have a story to tell, and giving the people in your world the chance to tell a story about you, is better than ending up with vague memories (on your part) or vague platitudes (on theirs.)

You:  “Oh, it was just a life. I wish I’d done a bit more with it, actually. I had/never had the opportunities. Too late now, I guess.”

And them: “Oh, she was a nice enough lady. Two lovely cats. She worked hard for thirty years but I’m not actually sure what she did there. ”

(Or, worse: “her? She was a cow.”)

No, this is what you want. You want to be able to say you have very few regrets; that you accepted your gift of life with a big thank-you, undid the satin bow and carefully removed the paper and used what was in the box with reverence and panache. And you had a great time along the way!

And you want someone else to say: “Yeah, she was really cool. She did this/that and she made a real difference, in fact I can’t imagine life without her. And she was always so kind and funny, but sharp. Totally switched on. We loved her. We’ll miss her.” (Or better still: “They should make a movie of her life.” Well, we can but dream!)

“LIFE IS A PRETTY PRECIOUS AND WONDERFUL THING. YOU CAN’T SIT DOWN AND LET IT LAP AROUND YOU …YOU HAVE TO PLUNGE INTO IT; YOU HAVE TO DIVE THROUGH! AND YOU CAN’T SAVE IT, YOU CAN’T STORE IT UP; YOU CAN’T HORDE IT IN A VAULT. YOU’VE GOT TO TASTE IT; YOU’VE GOT TO USE IT. THE MORE YOU USE, THE MORE YOU HAVE…THAT’S THE MIRACLE OF IT!”

KYLE SAMUEL CRICHTON